Late Night Stunner at the Northampton as spectators are dazzled with Brilliance!


Published Feb 23, 2014

The 13th rendition of the annual Cock Tournament was held last night at the Northampton, Lehigh Valley's Premier croquet facility.  A broad age range of contestants, tricky snow piles and varying degrees of alcoholism paved the way for a spectacle under the lights.  The grounds crew put forth a phenomenal effort to rid the course of snow and ice.  Contestants were overheard saying "Wow".  There was food and drink aplenty including Canadian sausages, cocktail shrimp and enough beer choices to quell the host.  Guest appearances this year included Santa Claus and a local tree trimmer.

Last year's champion, Uncle Tony Liberto was in attendance to defend the title.  Past Holders and wannabe Holders filled the grounds taunting and yelling awaiting their chance to wrestle the cock from Tony's hands.  A few notable players ran the course early on but failed miserably in later rounds.  After 7 preliminary bouts and a well fought semi-final round, the final 4 emerged.  John Sartorious, Ed Womer, Uncle Tony and someone else.  They started off pacing each other, hitting their little colored balls.  John was first to make his way back through the wickets.  Uncle Tony was next to follow.  Getting themselves in a spot of bother near the finish, former holder Ed made a charge from mid field and finished first raising his arms in victory.  The crowd went wild.  Some went home.

 Shortly thereafter, the remaining spectators rushed inside so as not to miss the closing ceremony.  On a dimly lit dais, Northampton Master of Ceremonies Bruce McIntosh announced dues will remain the same for 2015 and then left the podium so Tony could relinquish his grasp of the magnificent bird.  With a tear in his eye he wondered off somewhere as 2014 champion Ed Womer started his victory speech.  All in attendance were left wondering just what's in store for the cock this coming year. 


Spirited play by Mary Grimes won her both the Cockette and the Archie Peck award thus making it worth the trip.  Also worth noting, the Gertzes took everyone's money in Left Center Right.


Most notable improvement over last year's course was an inlay of carpet between wickets #2 and #3 giving players an easy stroll over what was once a runaway hazard. Also, a motion sensor light at the Collection Station made for much cleaner samples.  Brilliant!  On a side note Pepperidge Farm will be back next year as the premier sponsor.  Actually the only sponsor.

*****Late Breaking Update*****  
The vehicle that was transporting collected urine samples to the lab was involved in an accident with a soup truck making a delivery at the Waffle House.  All specimens were tainted with vegetable beef.  Those with hot samples need not worry.  You may also think twice about eating at the waffle house.